Should i be upset about this ?

me my boyfreind and our son went to the playground the other day. a freind of ours was there with her two kids also. my son was climbing on something and his little shoe came off. he got on the ground and started putting it back on. ( he is 4 and wearing tieless velcroless shoes)


being a little boy it is going to take a little longer to get his foot back in the shoe. as soon as my son sat on the ground , our freind got up , went over to my son and put the shoe on his foot. he whimpered about wanting to do it himself. then she picked him up and put him on the step to the slide. he stood there and pouted for another few seconds then ran off.


when our freind came back my boyfreind told her he can put his shoes on by himself and that it just takes him a little longer. she mouthed off that we were just sitting there lazy and not doing anything. soon we got into a little argument. i told her she was over reactiong over a shoe and she said that i being his mother should of helped him. my boyfreind butted in again about him liking to do things for himself. ( ITS JUST A DAMN SHOE! )


i am ticked that wether or not i was going to help him she stepped in before i could. and i am even more upset that she was VERY rude to my boyfriend. although she is our freind should i still be upset? what is your opinion? THANKS

Should i be upset about this ?
Your friend seems the extremely opinionated type. I've known many of these. (I've been one myself, on occasion.) The bottom line is that you are right and your friend is wrong. Yes, your anger is justified. Here's why I think so:





Your child is YOURS to raise. YOU know your child better than anyone. For your friend to assume that you were not doing your job as a parent simply because you know that your child has a strong personal will and likes to do things himself, is not only presumptuous but downright rude. Unfortunately, this is simply a product of a different mindset. She was probably raised with people doing every little simple thing for her, which has led to her believing this is the proper way to behave. In my experience this only breeds helpless people who would rather wait around for someone to do something for them.





Your friend needs to back off and understand the boundaries that exist in a situation such as that. If your friend cannot understand that simple concept and learn to back down a bit off her opinions then perhaps you should think about distancing yourself from that person. She's obviously got more growing to do.
Reply:yes you should be very upset this is your son and your right it was just a shoe she had no right to say anything to your son or argue with your boyfriend.and your son putting on his shoe he should be self sufficent
Reply:yes
Reply:Just reinforce to her that your son can do things for himself. Yes, you have a right to be upset. People get upset over the silliest things. You are trying to teach your son to look after himself.
Reply:ask her when she got her mother of the year award and what the heck she thinks makes her a better parent than you


tell her that you are trying to give you child problem solving skills that he will use in later in life when you wont be able to do EVERYTHING for him!!!!


i said that to my sister and she had no reply


I also went to school for this
Reply:Its over a shoe. let it go. but u should tell her where your coming from...just so it doesnt happen again.
Reply:you have every right to be upset. it's not like your kid was starving and she fed him something to eat. she overstepped her bounds by telling you how to raise your child. you are trying to raise him to be independant, and not reliant on everyone for every little thing. i would tell her that although you enjoy hanging out with her and her kids, you do not appreciate her implementing her parenting style on YOUR child. tell her that you are raising your son to be independant, and that you let him do little things (like putting on his shoe) by himself. if she continues to do things like this, tell her that you do not want to hang out with her and the kids anymore. maybe just hang out with her when you have a babysitter, so that she can't make parenting decisions around you....this way you still get to hang out as friends. good luck!
Reply:Awww porr little guy. I would have been mad too. Just tell her how you feel. In a nice way:)


God Bless:)



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